Yesterday was the 4th Anniversary of my Wedding to Alan. I remember it is four because it is one year less than my eldest sons’ age and one year more than my youngest sons’ age. We’ve fit a lot into our four years of marriage (six years since we met at The World’s End Hotel – so apt!). There’s been a son, a wedding, another son, an interstate move, an intrastate move, a move within a town and a move up a hill. We are both Arians – perhaps this constant need for change and moving forward is indicative of that? Or we just bore easily. Either way, we like to put ourselves through experiences that constantly seem to rank in the top 10 most stressful things to do. Thankfully thus far we’ve avoided the awful ones of divorce and death (and long may we continue to avoid those!).
We don’t tend to celebrate our wedding anniversary very fancily. Yesterday morning I gave him a card and his present – two packets of Natural Confectionary Company Licorice (his favourite). Yesterday evening he brought home take-away pizza and gorgeous cakes for a family dinner al-fresco. (We were going to be all posh and eat in a restaurant but given the bridge had been flooded out earlier that afternoon I’d decided to stay put. Given the wetness of the wet season so far, someone is going to be getting an inflatable raft for Christmas).
But that’s us though. Low-key. Family oriented. Our wedding was lovely. We had our ceremony and reception at a homestead in their beautiful garden. All in one place so no traipsing about; everyone available for photographs. Our wedding cake was a delicious croquembouche – yay for eating with hands. Our music was played and sung by our immediate and extended family - I walked in to my sister-in-law singing John Denver's 'For You'. (Read Bern Morley's post for more 'wedding songs'). It was intimate and peaceful and friendly and fun. We drove ourselves home in our full wedding outfits singing ‘Old MacDonald had a farm’ to our very well-behaved but very tired by then 11 month old son.
You don’t have to be married for long to realise that despite all the organisation of the wedding day, it is but one day out of many days and will soon become a distant but cherished memory – a bit like childbirth in that respect. It is all the days ever after that require the preparation and effort and care and attention. And so it should be. I like being married and I like being a mother and although it can be tiring and draining, it gives me joy enough to want to do it always.
|Sometimes it can feel like this|
So, to my lovely husband thank you for four marvellous years and here is to many more. May they continue to be joyful and interesting and loving. And I re-iterate here as I did four years ago these few words from my vows to you:
I asked for a man who would make me happy, and I got that, and much more besides. I got a man who knows that the most important ingredient in any meal is the love and care that went into making it; who makes music that can break my heart, soothe my soul and make me dance with wild abandon, who makes me feel so comfortable and at ease that I feel I’ve known you all my life and perhaps beyond.
I got someone who I trust with my life and my love. I am so very lucky.
And I give to you, someone who will always appreciate you, who will honour your trust and commitment, who will share your dreams, return your affection and join in your laughter. I give you someone who will love you all the days of her life.